Often, we’re so quick to focus on the stress that men and women experience during a divorce that we forget the stress that a breakup can have on their children. For small children, and even maturing teenagers, the separation of their parents can wreak havoc on their mental well-being while shaking their sense of security.
Some divorces are inevitable, so the question is, what can be done to help your children navigate through the process with as few negative emotional side-effects as possible?
Here are several proven strategies for helping kids through the divorce process.
Don’t Show Conflict During the Divorce
First of all, don’t fight in front of them! During a separation and divorce, both the husband and wife often experience plenty of hurt feelings and negative emotions. Too often, this turns the once-happy couple into the bitterest of enemies. It can be extremely difficult for kids to observe parents who once loved one another now fighting constantly and saying negative things about each other.
Not only is this stressful for kids — who sometimes feel like they have to side with one parent over the other — but it can make them wonder if their parents continue to love them. No matter how upset you get, resist the urge to fight with your ex. If you truly do need to have a heated discussion or disagreement, make sure you do it someplace where your children won’t see it.
Remember to be a Parent
Focus on being a parent during the divorce, first and foremost. Now that you’re getting a divorce, your top priority should remain focused on being a parent. Do what you can to shift your attention away from the situation with your ex and try to find ways of doing what’s right for your children.
Ensure that you’re there to help them work through their feelings, provide for them, and give them a stable home life. Rather than fighting it out in court, you can opt to use mediation to team up with your ex to provide the best possible outcome for your children once a settlement has been reached.
You and Your Children Have a Future After Divorce
Don’t dwell on the past for very long. Too often, divorced fathers and mothers keep their focus on the past, thinking about the wrongs that have been done by their ex. Rather than fall into this trap, work to focus on what’s ahead and help your children get excited about the good things that are coming up in their future.
By realizing that there is hope for tomorrow, your kids will have incentive to get through the rough times that a divorce can bring. Divorce is never easy on anyone, let alone innocent children. Use the three tips listed above to help them get through this trying time.
It also helps to have the experience of a professional attorney assisting you through the complex divorce process. Whether it’s an uncontested divorce or a contested one, attorney Joseph T. Welsh can guide his clients through every step of the proceedings.
Kansas Divorce Attorneys Ready to Help
While you may have tried your best to fix your marriage and prevent a divorce, sometimes it isn’t possible to continue making it work. As you prepare to file for divorce, this process could leave you feeling emotionally and physically drained. Working with an experienced divorce attorney like Joseph T. Welsh can help give you that space to breathe again.
Joseph Welsh understands the importance of focusing on your best interests so you have a positive outcome from your divorce case. His compassionate approach for those facing the rigors of this emotionally draining process can help you safeguard your future.
Contact him today at (620) 510-5030 to receive a free consultation and discuss your needs. With years of negotiating experience as a former U.S. District Attorney in Kansas, he can map out the best path to get you through this trying time and moving forward in life.